Searching...

to find how I can make a difference, where I fit in and how I can help. Being born a helper is so satisfying, but frustrating at the same time. I think I'm partly a control freak, because I want everyone else's burdens so that I can take awaly their pain. I just spent the afternoon reading Keri's blog, and wow, let it be mine. Let me take the heart ache, frustration, anger, sorrow, and all that is bad for her.

I wake up with Rizzi and wonder what will be her hurdles for the day and PLEASE, let them be mine. I hate to see her in any distress...

Watching her hang a picture (I'm soooo not good with tools) she amazes me!! She is truly my center and balance, by bestfriend, confidante, all of it....even if I do frustrate her :)

*****

Ok, so there I am minding my own business, cleaning out the sink. Now usually we use Soft Scrub, however I had some Comet so I thought I would use it....well ok, we ran out of the other so I had no choice, but anyways...I start scrubbing the sink and Comet has the most distinct smell too it...it seriously took me back to being a kid with my sister doing chores.

I was 11 or 12 which made Jenny 10 or 11. My mom and dad worked during our summer vacations so we were left to tend ourselves (we were good kids so my parents didn't have much to worry about....yet). Every morning we would wake up to find the dreaded yellow note pad left on the counter with the days chores that had to be accomplished before my mom arrived home from work.

First thing we would do in the morning....turn off the stupid swamp cooler...it was cold. Even the note mom left said NOT to turn it off, it would get hot in the afternoon and the swamp cooler would have a hard time catching up, we knew she'd never know the difference. We'd go out to the kitchen with our wild, just woke up hair, with red sleepy eyes and moan over the list of projects/chores that needed to be done. We knew that mom wouldn't be home until close to 1500, so we would get our cereal, go out to the living room and turn on The Price is Right....god I loved that show!! We'd slowly wake up to Who's the Boss and crack each other up with who know what now. I'd always let Jenny shower first, she is the girliest girl I know, so that she could take her time in getting ready. We seriously wouldn't step outside until close to noon. We would walk to KarMart most days with the few dollars mom left us to buy New York Seltzer's...do you remember those....oh yeah Raspberry was the best. We'd always buy Swedish Fish too....used to be able to get them for a penny a piece. We'd walk back home and sit on the porch and talk about everything and nothing. We'd pull out the "boom box" and listen to music, people watch and talk sooooo much shit about everyone....we would laugh non-stop. She was my everything...my sister, bestfriend, partner in crime....hell she still is!!
At about 1430 we'd freak out that mom was gonna be home soon....AHHHH!! We'd run into the house like time snuck up on us and scramble for the yellow list. I usually had to clean the bathroom, and I'd let Jenny vacuum....she said it was easier. I'd grab the sponge and start with the sink. The comet would puff out of the canister and it was always so cool to watch the water hit it...and the smell...